You turn 6 today and as I reflect on how much you have grown and what you have already experienced, my mother's heart is both proud and aching. I wish I could shield you from the pain and hurt that you will go through as you continue to grow. I wish I could explain to you why this world isn't fair with something besides "it just isn't." I wish I could leave you out of my life's drama, but you are a part of that life and sometimes, through no fault of your own, you will get dragged into it. And for that, most of all, I am sorry.
Your heart is huge. Your capacity to love and forgive is neverending and man, how I pray the world does not change that about you. It is going to be hard, though. I wish I could say it will get easier. Your heart is going to be broken by friends and family and girls and I am going to want to fix it, but I can't. I can, however, promise you that you will survive. You will carry on and heal and find out, through it all, what real friendship is, that family can be hard but they will always be family, and that there is one girl out there that will love you for all that you are. Just be patient.
I want you to find strength in one thing and one thing only, and that is God. Only He can carry you through the times when you feel most like giving up. I want you to know the love that comes from trusting Him and His plans, no matter how hard that may feel at times. Know that His faithfulness has carried your momma through some rough times and only by His grace have I made it through with joy.
And, sweet boy, always be kind. No matter the circumstances, lead with a kind and loving heart. I want you to be a light in this world and show people what I see: an amazing, loving, gentle, giving soul whose capacity to love is abundant. Do not give in to the frustrations of the world and react to other peoples negativity - show them kindness or just walk away. Never, ever start a fight. But never let someone else belittle or abuse you or someone else in your presence. Be the person who stands up for the little man. Just do it in kindness.
Finally, my son, remember how unbelievably proud I am of you. No matter where life takes you, no matter the career path you some day choose, know, without a doubt that I love you. I haven't always done things right; I know I've screwed a few things up. But so far, I think, you are no worse for wear. :)
I love you, to the moon and back, to infinity and beyond, forever and ever.
Every year I have been asking Lucas the same questions and keeping track of his answers. Here are his 2015 Q & A.... Some answers are the same, some are very optimistic and others just make me smile... :)
2015 Birthday Questions
What is your favorite color? Orange
What is your favorite toy? My dinosaur transformer I'm going to get for my b-day.
What is your favorite fruit? Bananas
What is your favorite TV show? Miles from Tomorrowland
What is your favorite thing to eat for lunch? Turkey, cracker and cheese Lunchables
What is your favorite outfit? Sometimes gray - sweat pants & T-shirts
What is your favorite game? Mario Bros. (Nintendo & Wii)
What is your favorite snack? Ranch Doritoes
What is your favorite animal? Lions
What is your favorite song? Uptown Funk by Bruno Mars
What is your favorite book? The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein
Who is your best friend? Sophie
What is your favorite cereal? All of them
What is your favorite thing to do outside? Ride my bike and other ride on toys.
What is your favorite drink? Lemonade
What is your favorite holiday? Halloween
What is your favorite think to eat for breakfast? Waffles
What do you want for dinner on your birthday? Macaroni and cheese
What do you want to be when you grow up? A train conductor